Heute
Well I slept pretty well last night. As I stirred to awake this morning I felt wrapped in love. The phone rang and I darted to the kitchen in my t-shirt, socks and undies to grab it. It was my best friend. MMmmMmmmmm. It was heavenly to hear his voice as I awoke. He said he felt that I was awake and called to say goodmorning. Good morning indeed.
Tuesday when I took my son to his riding lesson I didn't tell him we were going to riding lessons. I had him put on his new shoes and told him we had to go in a few minutes. Since he is not riding with stirrups it isn't crucial he wear his boots...LOL It went really well because he didn't have time to argue or put up a fight. We had one other errand to run and after that I promised him food from a local drive thru establishment.
Tuesday night my son had a breakthrough and was telling his dad how he knew he was getting sick when he was around four and by the time he was eight he knew he had autism. He explained a lot of things to his dad as best as he could and was answering questions pretty well. When he was around four is when he got quite the round of vaccinations and he reacted badly to them.
Well today being Friday is horseback riding lessons for he and I both. I don't look forward to the typical headache of getting him out the door. He usually acts like the sky is falling and tells me how he doesn't want to go, etc. We are working on this tho, as he learns that it's what we do on certain days it becomes more part of the routine, as it has been for the past six months.
Last Friday I was riding Fox, he's a pony and work horse cross. He's short and wide and just an awesome critter. He's a Leo with a true Leo personality. He's my buddy, I love him. So anywho, it was pretty darn hot so instead of riding in the arena where it's not too shady we were working in a different area on the property where it was more filtered sun. Twice Fox lost his footing and I thought we were both goin down for sure the one time. Having time to look back I can see that Fox and I were connected deeply as horse and rider and I believe a mutual intent to recover from the lost footing brought us back up safely. Not to mention our teacher's. She's mostly American Indian and she glows of her heritage although sometimes I don't think she realizes it. At the point of almost having a wreck I can see how all the stretching with closed eyes while the horse is being led at a walk fit in. The balance in motion came together. I am still working on riding at a trot on my balance, with hands on hips. I am getting a lot closer tho.
So with getting over the tonsillitis my teacher said to come anyway and if I need to take it easy then we'll take it easy. I believe she has tuned in to me being my own biggest competition. I want to advance in my knowledge and this is obvious so she tells me not to be so hard on myself more than anything.
Although it's usually quite the chore to be ready and out the door by a certain time because of the defiance issues, I look forward to the changes that take place during and afterwards. Our teacher had explained to me that some parents quit taking their kids because the changes are so dramatic. Kids go from small, almost nonexistent, vocabularies to having a couple hundred words in a matter of months. They have a turn towards normal. I admit this can be frustrating but why the hell would a parent not want that for their kid? Ya know?
I don't know what it would be like for CJ to resemble 'normal'. I don't know if I would want him to be what we think of as 'normal'. He is super smart, it's just a matter of knowing what angle to teach him different things from. I believe he is way more intelligent than 'normal'. He is gifted in many ways that 'normal' doesn't seem to have. He is intuitive in many ways as well as am I and his dad. It was intuition that brought us to horseback riding.
So I have been doing a lot of mental processing and deep ruminating lately. There has been a lot going on even tho it doesn't seem like it. Changes with in myself, CJ's changes, my room mate's reactions to it all. The dynamics are different, totally. Then add in the addition of a relationship on my part. My room mate's reaction to that, which really isn't that dramatic since we are still best friends after the divorce. So my life as I know it has changed dramatically. I am just attempting to resettle into it somehow. Maybe that's why it's important to feel comfortable in your own skin.
So I shall go begin my day and glow when my best friend comes to mind. I guess my eyes turn bright green when I'm deep in thought or talking about him. And I shall have fun while I bond more to the horse I am riding. Whether it be Fox or Sun Up, the noble Morgan I also ride.
I feel like it's gonna be a sunny, cheery day.
SJ
Tuesday when I took my son to his riding lesson I didn't tell him we were going to riding lessons. I had him put on his new shoes and told him we had to go in a few minutes. Since he is not riding with stirrups it isn't crucial he wear his boots...LOL It went really well because he didn't have time to argue or put up a fight. We had one other errand to run and after that I promised him food from a local drive thru establishment.
Tuesday night my son had a breakthrough and was telling his dad how he knew he was getting sick when he was around four and by the time he was eight he knew he had autism. He explained a lot of things to his dad as best as he could and was answering questions pretty well. When he was around four is when he got quite the round of vaccinations and he reacted badly to them.
Well today being Friday is horseback riding lessons for he and I both. I don't look forward to the typical headache of getting him out the door. He usually acts like the sky is falling and tells me how he doesn't want to go, etc. We are working on this tho, as he learns that it's what we do on certain days it becomes more part of the routine, as it has been for the past six months.
Last Friday I was riding Fox, he's a pony and work horse cross. He's short and wide and just an awesome critter. He's a Leo with a true Leo personality. He's my buddy, I love him. So anywho, it was pretty darn hot so instead of riding in the arena where it's not too shady we were working in a different area on the property where it was more filtered sun. Twice Fox lost his footing and I thought we were both goin down for sure the one time. Having time to look back I can see that Fox and I were connected deeply as horse and rider and I believe a mutual intent to recover from the lost footing brought us back up safely. Not to mention our teacher's. She's mostly American Indian and she glows of her heritage although sometimes I don't think she realizes it. At the point of almost having a wreck I can see how all the stretching with closed eyes while the horse is being led at a walk fit in. The balance in motion came together. I am still working on riding at a trot on my balance, with hands on hips. I am getting a lot closer tho.
So with getting over the tonsillitis my teacher said to come anyway and if I need to take it easy then we'll take it easy. I believe she has tuned in to me being my own biggest competition. I want to advance in my knowledge and this is obvious so she tells me not to be so hard on myself more than anything.
Although it's usually quite the chore to be ready and out the door by a certain time because of the defiance issues, I look forward to the changes that take place during and afterwards. Our teacher had explained to me that some parents quit taking their kids because the changes are so dramatic. Kids go from small, almost nonexistent, vocabularies to having a couple hundred words in a matter of months. They have a turn towards normal. I admit this can be frustrating but why the hell would a parent not want that for their kid? Ya know?
I don't know what it would be like for CJ to resemble 'normal'. I don't know if I would want him to be what we think of as 'normal'. He is super smart, it's just a matter of knowing what angle to teach him different things from. I believe he is way more intelligent than 'normal'. He is gifted in many ways that 'normal' doesn't seem to have. He is intuitive in many ways as well as am I and his dad. It was intuition that brought us to horseback riding.
So I have been doing a lot of mental processing and deep ruminating lately. There has been a lot going on even tho it doesn't seem like it. Changes with in myself, CJ's changes, my room mate's reactions to it all. The dynamics are different, totally. Then add in the addition of a relationship on my part. My room mate's reaction to that, which really isn't that dramatic since we are still best friends after the divorce. So my life as I know it has changed dramatically. I am just attempting to resettle into it somehow. Maybe that's why it's important to feel comfortable in your own skin.
So I shall go begin my day and glow when my best friend comes to mind. I guess my eyes turn bright green when I'm deep in thought or talking about him. And I shall have fun while I bond more to the horse I am riding. Whether it be Fox or Sun Up, the noble Morgan I also ride.
I feel like it's gonna be a sunny, cheery day.
SJ
posted by SJ at Freitag, August 05, 2005
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